I have approximately $60,000 in students loans to pay off before I die. I know, terrible isn't it. And I'm not even a Dr! I just went to school way too long and borrowed way too much money. I knew that I was going to have to pay them back, but the reality wasn't in my face at the time. And it sure was nice to gegt a refund check of $2000 twice a year. PAR-TAY BABY!
But now that I have been out of college for several years, paying them off is kicking my ass! One thing that has helped me though is student loan consoldation.
If you are looking to find an easier and less painful way to pay off your student loan debt, you need to look into Federal Student Loan Consolidations as an option. I did, I am am so glad.
Now to just win the lottery so that I can pay them off before the year 2036 (and no I am not kidding).
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I know that it is winter, but I live in the South people. We aren't supposed to have Winter Weather Warnings!
weather.com - Local Severe Weather Alerts Details
They are calling for 1-2 inches of ice! It is so totally going to suck. I know that here are people that live in areas that get snow and ice all the time but we are not used to this and I am freezing me ass off here! I am dreading going to work tomorrow. The people here CAN NOT drive in winter weather. Do you know what they put on the roads for ice and snow?
All that does is make dirty snow. And the last time that they called for something like this we got close to 18 inches here. Not that snow is bad, but ice just sucks major ass.
So keep me in your thoughts tomorrow as I try to get to work. Maybe they will all be wrong.
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I know that we won't have to worry about where to stay though. AM's brother lives in DeBary FL, which is about 30 minles or so south of Orlando. FL I think. They keep saying that they are going to move here, but I don't see it happening anytime soon. At least I hope they don't move until we have made our little adventure into craziness anyway.
And I can't believe the number of people that are moving there. We have talked about it, but I can't live anywhere there isn't a least some change in season. Apparently a large number of Brits are buying houses in the area? Who knew? I guess it is warmer there or something.
Are you British by chance? Please tell me the appeal. Then check out the link so see available Orlando properties. Your wish may come true!
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When I started blogging, I never expected for anyone to read my inner most thoughts. The entire reason I started was to give myself an outlet in which to vent and get it out of my system. I don’t have any friends, so there is no one to talk to when I am upset, sad, and/or pissed. Talking (or in this case blogging) is the way in which I collect my thoughts and try to rationalize and calm myself down. Most of the time I am just raging and it truly means nothing. However, those of you that read what I write don’t know what is fact and what is just incoherent bullshit. This is my own personal made-up world. In my mind, they are just words but words can cut like a knife and leave scars that are difficult if not impossible to heal.
During the process, I few started reading. I think there is a handful out there that read me on a regular basis. One of my newest readers is my husband; otherwise known here as Alpha Male. While I never openly invited him to read my blog, I never tried to overtly hide it either. He knew I blogged, and once I started doing PayPerPost.com I had to write from home so he saw it.
And he read every single entry (to include comments). While writing my inner most thoughts and spewing forth my frustrations for the world to see, I never took into account how he would feel if he ever read my words. Words that were about him. And my words ripped his heart in two. Something I never-ever wanted or intended to happen. As much as he drives me crazy, I love him more than I ever thought I could ever love another human being (my children excluded of course). I am by no way perfect, and have many more faults than I would like to admit. More than is probably healthy. But the things that I said about him were unfair.
He is a good man. No…he is a GREAT man. The best man I have ever known in my entire life. And I totally take him for granted. Since the start he has been the most generous and loving man that I have ever known. He will give a stranger the shirt off his back, and he would lay down his life for those that he loves. I so wish that I could be more like him. For as much as I would like to say that I am the same way, I cannot. I would rather live in my own little world. I am selfish. I am a bitch most of the time. I will admit it, and I am not proud of it. That’s probably why I don’t have any friends.
Everything that I have today is either directly (or indirectly) because of him. My financial stability, my job, my house, my beautiful children. EVERYTHING. I literally owe him my life. He has been the most supportive person in my life and is always there when I need him. He spoils me rotten and he so totally deserves to be treated the same. And I have failed miserably to this point. He has repeatedly put up with my shit and still given me everything that I have ever wanted. Anything I have ever wanted he has provided, even if he had to do without. But I seem to only see when I don’t get my way.
For all the negative words that I have spoken about him here, to date there is not one positive word to show how much he truly means to me. Not one, and that is wrong on so many levels. I can only imagine how hurtful that was. He deserves more respect that I have shown him here. I didn’t realize that I was so harsh and I apologize. I regret spilling my thoughts out for strangers to see. I am so very, very sorry. I wish that I could take back all the hurtful words ~ undo the pain.
This is my feeble attempt to rectify the situation. To say I am so sorry for all that has been said and done. I want the world to know how much I love and cherish you. How much I am truly sorry that I have not been the wife you want and deserve. How wonderful, loving and caring you are. How you are the best father any woman could ever ask for. How I couldn’t live without you.
I love you more than you could ever know Alpha Male. Even though I have a really shitty way of showing it. I hope that someday you can find room in your heart to forgive me. I am sorry that it has taken me so long to find the words to say I am sorry. Nothing I can say can adequately express how sorry I am that I hurt you. I know this won’t take back all the hurt, but I hope it is at least a start.
At the NHL Forum you can learn all kinds of things about hockey. Already a pro? Talk the talk with other fanatical hockey fans or declare the ultimate team. Whatever suits yor fancy they have it there.
I am hoping to catch a Carolina Hurricane's game while I am in Greensboro in March. Should be fun for all. What other sport is it encouraged to knock someone's teach out with a puck? Whoo Hoo!
Who is your favorite NHL team? Who's going to win the Stanley Cup this year?
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My Nanny used to watch General Hospital ever single day. I don't think she missed a day ever. Wouldn't she have loved to go to www.soaps.com and read all about her stories without having to watch them. But then again she couldn't even work the VCR :) My Pa-paw still watches them to this day.
But for those of you who do watch the other soaps, you can check out the things you missed without blinking an eye. Catch up on all the adulterous affairs and incestuous rendevous till your little heart is content.
And Erin, now you have one more site to read. haha!
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I don't have much money so I think that I am going to bring the laptop, Season 6 of Dawson's Creek and The Divinci Code to keep me company. Maybe I can actually finish the book on this trip. I have only been reading it for almost 3 months now. I am a slow reader anyway, and then when I never get a chance to read it takes me forever to finish a book.
Speaking of reading. I found an awesome website for those of you who love to read, but are on a tight budget. It is called Book Mooch and basically it is a book swap. All you do is list the books that ou want to trade and pay shipping when someone wants it. That's it. You put up a wish list and they contact you when something you want is available. I haven't traded anything yet, but as soon as I get through with the books I have I have a big list ready.
If I decide to take the laptop I will try and update you on my weekend. If not, have a great one. Stop by my renter one more time before he makes his grand exit won't you?
I am planning on using my laptop at least once a week at work to transpose notes at a weekly meeting I have to attend. I am the scribe and it was a waste of time to handwrite all the notes and then go back and type them out.
So now I am in search for the perfect flashdrive. I can't connect my laptop to the network so this is really the only way to go. I think I found just the right place. At www.Pexagontech.com they have bunches of personalized flash drives. Custom laser printing is free with your order. How cool is that?
I think I am going to get a 1 GB personalized thumbdrive for that awesome price of $18.99 in hot pink. WHOO WEE! Won't I be a hot mamma! I definately am going to pick something bright so that I don't loose the thing.
So if this sounds like something you would do, go get ya one. Be the coolest geeky girl around. I'll be right there with you.
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Now that I work full time I rarely get to watch them. There is no sense in taping them bacause I don't have time to go back and watch them later. But now I don't have to! I can simply go here and catch up on all my shows. How great it that !
Now to find somewhere to read them without getting into trouble at work!
This post was sponsored by href="'>http://www.soaps.com/youngandrestless/"> The Young and the Restless
Until then...please check out my renter over there in the right hand corner. He is only here for a few more days, and I can't say that I have been all that attentive. Sorry bout that roomie! So go show him some love!
While randomly browsing other people's blogs, I found this really cool site. It's called Gimme Your Stuff. Basically, it is an international swap.
What's it all about?
Welcome to Gimme Your Stuff, the cultural exchange blog where you can swap items of significance to your area with items from others around the world. A conduit for many an international cuisine to change hands. A place where you can trade a newspaper from South Africa, or a CD from Finland. A place where we take no responsibility for anything anyone else does. A place where we are Changing the world with other people’s stuff.
I thought it would be fun to try it out. I love getting stuff and others cultures so why not! If you are interested in doing the same, check them out and sign up!
I haven't mentioned it before (I don't think-if I did sorry) but Alpha Male and myself signed up for a weightloss program through our work for the next 10 weeks. It is called York County Shrinkdown. Really anyone in York County can participate, but through our work we get extra incentives if we do certain things. Things like go to lectures and exercise. They assign points for each activity and at the end you get you name in a drawing for $100 and other cool prizes if you have enough points. The actual county program also has contest too. Winning stuff and getting healthy is cool dudes! Each Friday you go to the local Y and they weigh you. Simple enough. I think I'll call my Friday weight loss posts.....Freakin'Friday.
Well, when I weighed in at the beginning last week I was 271 (OUCH!).
Today when I weighed in...................................................... 267.
FOUR POUNDS PEOPLE! (and that was WITH Aunt Flo too!)
And that was just from watching what I have been eating and walking 1 mile two of those days. Just think what I could do if I actually tried. YEA ME!!! But I know that it won't be that easy every week. I.must.work.harder. But I was so excited. I am seriously thinking about joining the Y (no member fee this month and no contract). However, my work has a workout room that I can use for free so I am considering just using that to save money.
Tonight AM and I did a Walk Away The Pounds. We walked 2 miles in 30 minutes. Man, I am tired now. haha In a little while I think I might shower and watch Step Up. I am all for the mindless teenage drivel.
Last night Drama Queen wanted Maw-maw and Pop-pop to come over so we let her call them while we were eating. She did the funniest thing. For some reason, she thinks that people can see her through the cell phone. So she proceeds to hold her meat from the hamburger helper (I know- so healthy) up to the screen of the phone and says" See Maw-maw I am eating my burger!". AM and I thought we would die we were laughing so hard. And she was dead serious too.
Tonight we through DQ's diddy's (aka pacifiers) away. I know she is 3, but she was still taking them at night. She hasn't had one at day care in over a year, but I just couldn't deal with the whining. AM and I had all that we could take. Over the last several days she has been whining and crying for it incessantly all day and night long. So, it was time for them to go. We bagged them up and made her throw them all (5 - gasp!) in the trash. She cried for a little while when we first put her to bed, but so far so good. Of course I jsut jinxed myself by typing this though. I have a feeling its going to be a long weekend :(
I called Bart's new owner this afternoon. I just had to know how things were going. She absolutely loves him. He now sleeps in the bed with her and has free reign of the house during the day while she is gone. She says he doesn't mess in the house while she is gone, but he won't go potty for her outside. I am sure that it is just a phase and he will be fine. But she said other than that he is such a sweetheart. I am glad to know that I found someone that could love him and take great care of him. Now if I can just talk AM into letting me get a cat :grin:.
Alright, I typed a novel. I need to take a shower. I may have a glass of wine before bed. Make myself so relaxed that I pass out :) Sounds like heaven.
So get to click'n chicken! Tell him I sent ya! Who knows, maybe you'll see a guest post :)
I hope you are happy little buddy in your new home. You were such a sweetheart and I'm really sorry it didn't work out. I will check up on you. Be a good boy.
Todays phones have GPS, MP3 players and more! It's crazy! And at www.wirefly.com you can get them all at incredible prices. Stop in and compare phones and plans. I know that I would so get the Chocolate if I had verizon. But unfortunately, I have a city phone and it is with Cingular so I am stuck for now.
But that doesn't mean that you can't live it up and get you a cool new phone for the new year. Bring 2007 in with a bang!
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I made a call and Michael at www.betterdog.com is going to come over and evaluate us and Bart. He is a professional dog trainer in the area with excellent recommendations. I don't know if I am going to use his training services, as he is expensive ($75 per session) but I definately value his opinion. It will be nice to have another person work one-on-one with Bart and let us know what his problems are and give us some solutions. It will be interesting to see what he says.
I'll let you know what he says. Hopefully he can guide us in the right direction.
I am considering using a natural solution for fat-burning supplement called dynathin. You can read all about it at their site http://www.dynathin.com . It sounds like a great product. They claim that there are no harsh side effects and it burns fat by boosting your metabolism. Whoo hoo! Jump start me baby! I think my metabolism is going backward at this point. I am willing to try anything to get this weight off again (within reason of course!).
Have you tried it? Ever heard of thier product? What do you think?
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I feel so guilty. I love the little guy I do. He loves me like no other dog I have ever had. Almost to the point of exhaustion. If I am not in his sight at all times he acts miserable. And the kids aren't really into him. They aren't really scared of him anymore, but they don't interact with him (as he doesn't interact with them either). I feel bad about him being in a crate all day while I am at work. And when I am home, it is so diffucult to juggle providing care and attention to both the puppy and the kids. We bought a kennel for outside, but he hates it out there too. He will whine and cry off and on the entire time he is out there.
And I can't help but worry that it will always be like this. Our plans were to basically take the dog anywhere and everywhere that we go. That wouldn't be an issue if I could leave his sight, but I just can't imagine taking him to NY this summer and having to deal with him and the kids camping for a week. I think my main problem is his inability to bond with anyone else in the family. If I was single, he would be perfect. However, I am not and that won't ever change.
The thought of giving him away brings me to tears. On one hand I really want to keep him. He is almost housebroken (he will not mess in his crate, and will go to the door when he wants out provided you take him out immediately). Alot of the issues can be corrected with training, and I know that. But his personality won't change. The breeder instilled this insecurity in him. When combined with the tendencies of the breed, I just don't know if I am the right person for this puppy.
I also know that I didn't remember how much work and money went into having a puppy either. I like my independence, and having this puppy is like having another child. And due to his anxiety, I can't leave him with a family member if we went somewhere that we couldn
t take him. Which means that I would have to board him. And I don't really have the money to do that on a regular basis either. I'm not sure that I was ready for that. That is selfish I know. I think that is why I feel so bad. He is a good dog and he deserves a happy and loving home.
I know the longer I keep him the harder it is going to be on both of us. And you know that just as soon as I get so frustrated with him that I can't stand it, he is a good boy and does something cute. So what should I do? What would you do in this situation? Ever had anything like this happen to you before?
He is a different dog now that I got him neutered. He no longer cries all the time when I am not with him and he doesn't have to be with me all the time in the house. It is great! Hope it stays this way!
Do you have pets? What do they do that is so funny? Got any funny cat videos or funny dog videos that you would like to share? If you would like to see some that others have submitted, check out the links above. Animals do the darnest things don't they?
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I just can't believe that she is 3 years old today. It seems like just yesterday that I was sitting at the movie theatre with my Jumbo Sprite. Little did I know that 18 hours later you would come into the world. The most perfect little thing that I have ever seen. The best thing that I have ever done in my whole life. All 6 pounds thirteen ounces of you.
You still are my little princess and you always will be. Just last night you stated that you had to go potty, but insisted that I stay out of the bathroom so you could do it yourself. My heart burst into a million pieces. For the little baby that is no longer "my baby" and for the big girl you have become. You never cease to amaze me with your inqusitive nature and crazy sense of humor. Only you could make bodily functions cute.
I hope you have the best birthday a little girl could ever have. Full of love, toys, and cake! Can't forget that cake, you have been asking for it for almost a week now.
I love you more each and every day!
So stop in, sit for awhile and say hello! I promise if you do I will do the same (and I don't bite, I swear!)
I knew that house-breaking wouldn't be an over-night thing and I was/am ready for it. What I didn't consider was the severe separation anxiety that he has. He is terried of me leaving his sight for even a minute and it is about to get on my last nerve.
He is crated during the day since he isn't housebroken yet. I hate leaving him in there so long, but I don't really have a choice. I am sure that he cries and whines most of the day since I know that he does it when I put him on the porch, confine him to the kitchen, or in the crate for even a few minutes. But what am I to do? I can't leave him loose in the house or he will never be house-broken. He doesn't mess in the crate, so I don't think that it will take a considerable amount for him to get the point. After I know I can trust him I will let him loose in the kitchen while we are gone. But until then....
The thing that is driving me absolutely freakin mad is that he cries and whines all night long. I am telling you, this dog has become so attached to me that he can't stand to not be by my side all the time. I love that he loves me and he is such a sweetie pie but enough already. For 3 nights I was up every hour telling him "no" and "hush". Anything and everything that I can think of short of throwing him outside. Last night I broke down and moved the crate into our bedroom at 1 am. I didn't really want to do that, but it was either do that or go absolutely loopy!
He did better and only whined a little bit and then slept until 5 am when AlphaMale woke to for work. I have been getting up at 5:30 to take him out (but of course most times he won't want to go until about 15 minutes later after I am freezing my ass off!). So I guess that is what we will be doing from now on. And no, I will not be letting him sleep with me in the bed. 1) AM won't allow it and 2) from everything I have read that doesn't really help the situation. I don't really mind that he sleeps in there except that his crate is big as hell, but I guess it is a small price to pay for sleep right?
But now AM is mad at me. See at 1 am I was sick and tired of being woke up and having to fuss at the dog. I tried to ignore him, but when he gets so loud that he is literally shaking the house something has to be done. Earlier I cleared a spot so that I could move him in there if I needed to and I thought that AM understood where I was putting him. Evidently, in his sleep induced stupor he didn't remember and I got really snippy with him (I'm really sorry about that by the way). Lack of sleep makes me a very NOT nice person. I was told that I had until Friday to find him a home. We had an "understanding" that this dog was not going to make me a raving bitch or I couldn't keep him. I didn't mean to snap. It's amazing what a few hours of sleep can do to a persons attitude.
So hopefully I can keep Bart, find a way to make AM happy, and stop the crazy dog from freaking out on me all the time. And tomorrow he gets the snippy snip so he should be in a realy good mood. Maybe I will ask for some doggy prozac or valium while I am there :)
Ever had a dog like this? What did you do?
Bartholomew Zachary aka Bart
He is a 5 month old CKC registered Bichon/Schnauzer puppy.
He seems to be adjusting to life with us. He follows us around everywhere, but is very hesitant to come to us. He is still very timid and afraid of people on general. He came from a breeder who is solely in it for profit so he wasn't socialized at all.
But he is really sweet and absolutely loves the kids. Now is we can just get the kids to love him. They are still afraid of him, especially when he tries to play with them. He especially loves WildMan.
Uh oh...gotta go. He just peed on the carpet! UGH!
Isn't he a cutie pie!
Many MANY thanks to Susie at bluebird blogs! She is great and reasonable too! I know I about drove her crazy with all my nit-picking but I think it came out great!
If you too are looking for a facelift-check her out! And tell her I sent ya!
If I was a millionaire I would definately move there. I can tell ya I don't see how anyone could be bored in the city. Many people move to Vegas chasing the American dream. If you are looking to rent a home to just get started this or this is an awesome place to start your search.
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Once I get it in my head that I want something I obsess about it, research it, and think about it non stop until I get it.
The newest thing is the acqusition of a new dog. Alpha male has dog allergies as most of you who have been reading awhile remember. I had to give my dog away in August due to his allergies. We both have commented on how much we miss having a pet. Up until the recent berak-in scare, we were going to get a cat. But now we feel that we would feel safer if we got a dog.
The only problem is finding one the won't totally distroy my husband's allergies. the majority of the dogs on his "can have" list are froo-froo dogs such as poodles, Schnauzers, etc. I have always wanted a little "froo-froo" dog, but we have always bought mutts.
Well I stumbled across the "hybrid" dogs and I think I found the one I want. I am totally in love with the Schnoodles and the Bichpoos. I found a breeder about an hour from here that has them for really reasonable. $250 for the Schnoodle and $100 for a Bichpoo (he's a little older). Since they are a hybrid they are considered healthier and have the qualities of both dogs, which I really like. And since they are both on AM's list of hypoallergenic dogs, I think he shouldn't have too many problems with his allergies. So hopefully I can convince him to go and look at him this weekend.
I am not totally looking forward to house breaking a puppy, but I so miss having a puppy that I can sit and cuddle with. And I have always wanted to be one of those annoying people that take their dogs everywhere with them. I have never had a dog that I could do that. All of mine were either too big or got car sick to easily.
So keep your fingers crossed for me! Which one do you like better? Do you have any pets?
Want to play some free poker? The newest wave of internet entertainment is online poker. A good blogging friend of mine can tell you all about it, she is a pro! I haven't tried it as of yet but I think I am going to now. http://www.pokersavvy.com/ is an excellent place to go for all your internet gaming needs. Pokersavvy.com has information on how to play internet poker, reviews other online casino websites, and has numerous links to other gaming websites.
So if you are bored and have nothing else to do, check them out. You might just have lady luck on your side and win back some of the money that you lost buying Christmas presents!
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Now that things have slowed down for me, it is time for me to let my fingers do the walking. I think that instead of using my cell phone and killing myself with over my minute fees, I am going to use Pingo this year. Pingo is a unique prepaid calling card service that allows you to call virtully anywhere in the world not pennies. I have a friend who lives in the United Kingdom, and with Pingo the calling card rates are less than $0.02 a minute. Got a friend in Zambia? It's only $0.09 a minute!
And if you sign up now, you get $5.00 in free calls just for signing up. It's prepaid, so what do you have to lose? It is a lot cheaper than those calling cards in the gorcery stores. And no charges to a hotel room on your bill if you are traveling.
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But alas, I am here. At least for a a few more minutes. I have to leave a few minutes early so that I can pick up some pull-ups for the dear, sweet, I refuse-to-pee-on-the-potty girl. What's another $15 out the window right? It is only money.
Is it bad that I can't wait until 8 pm so that I can go to bed. Geez I am an old fuddy-duddy now. Turn 32 and life turns to pot.
Anyway. Have a great evening everyone. How was your first day back?
Are you looking for a way to stretch those delicious dollars as far as possible? Then you need to check out Coupon Chief. They are an awsome online shopping site that feature online coupons and discounts that are only available through their website. For example, how about an additional 10% off at Target with no minimum to buy. Soungs great huh? Thought you would like it.
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When we got home I noticed that there was an eaten apple core by the reindeer outside the house. Strange, but it shouldn't be there. We don't live in a neighborhood so there is no reason for anyone to be throwing apples in the yard. We live a good 100 feet from the road. But I didn't think too much about it at the time. When I went to the store a little later I noticed that there was a large dent in the door knob.
When I got hoem I mentioned it to Alpha Male. Upon further inspection, it was obvious that someone tried to pry both the front and back doors open. Of course we have double key entry deadbolts so that was a no go, but it still scared the heck out of me. We have windows right on the deck, so if they really want in there is no way to stop them.
So now I am paranoid. We have the house locked up like fort Knox at night and are sleeping with the bedroom door open so we can hear better. We are considering a seciruty system and are also looking into getting a dog too. Ever since I had to give Shorty away I have been uneasy about not having a dog around. Even if we end of getting a little froo-froo ankle biter. At least we would know if there is someone outside.
I can't stand not feeling safe in my own home.
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What did I do? Alpha Male and I watch World Trade Center, watched the ball drop, and went to bed. Aren't we just party animals! WHOOOO!
But it beats what we did last year. Last year I think that we were in bed by 9:30, bums that we are. This afternoon we just hung out and researched puppies and played with the kids. It looks like we are going to get another dog, even though AM is allergic. Now to find one that is mostly hypo-allergenic so he can breath. Any suggestions?
Other than that it is boring around here. We have to go back to work tomorrow after being off over a week. I am totally not going to be motivated. And I need to catch up on everyone's blogs. I only have them bookmarked at work so I can't visit them when I am home. Guess I need to do something about that huh?