Recently, over at a great blog that I read daily, we were discussing weight and diet. I would venture to say that most Mom's know exactly what I am talking about. The dreaded "baby weight" that one can never seem to get rid of once the baby is out of our bodies. For mine, it is almost like my son is still in there. I swear to you, the other day I put on a dress that I hadn't worn since I was @ 3 months pregnant, and it I didn't stand perfectly straight and suck in the gut I had that round baby belly again. It was insane. I mean people on the street probably think I am preggers. How embarrassing is that? So...baby weight clubbers unite! We must shed those unwanted pounds at all costs!

In May of 2002 I had gastric bypass surgery. It was the best and toughest decision I have ever made. Pre-surgery weight I was about 370 and miserable. I now weight around [cringe] 260. At my lowest post-op I weighed 230. Now I wouldn't have said I was miserable then, but looking back I totally hated everything about my life. Since then I have lost around 150 pounds prior to having my children. I am told that I don't look anything like what I once did. I'll have to post a story about that at another time. Remind me to tell you about my 10 year high school reunion.

While I am extremely proud of my weight loss (even though not so much at the present time) there are many out there that don't agree with what I have done. I remember prior to having the surgery I had to be selective in who and how I told people about my upcoming life change. So many people tried to talk me out of it saying it was dangerous or that I could "lose the weight on my own if I just tried". I wanted to punch them in the face. I had been trying to lose it on my own- for years. Dr. assisted plans, counseling, weight loss drugs, Weight Watchers, etc. Nothing worked and I would just gain it all back plus another 10 pounds. At my initial surgery consult I was told that the odds of someone who is morbidly obese losing the weight in there own is somewhere around 3%. This is a reason why there are so many people in the US alone that are considered "super-sized".

For those that are in this category, food is an addiction. Just as an alcoholic is addicted to alcohol as a comfort or way to deal with life, a morbidly obese person relies on food. There are different reasons why people become that large, but none of us have healthy eating habits. For me, I turned to food any time there was emotion involved, particularly sadness. As a society, most events in life have food associated with them in some way. Think about it, what do you do when you have people over? Eat! Family get-togethers? Eat! Movies and television shows portray women with a pint of ice cream whenever they are having a bad day. Food is everywhere. And it doesn't help that, unlike alcohol, it is a substance that we must have daily in order to survive. Water, food, clothing, and shelter. The four essentials. Not a good thing when you have an addiction to it. Yes, it is in large part about knowing when to stop, but that is easier said than done. And once you get to a certain point, your body needs those calories to sustain itself (at least in your head it does).

Anyway, Easter Sunday 2002 I talked to someone at church that had the surgery and she looked fantastic. By the end of May I had my surgery date. (I won't bore you with all the details about what the surgery was like, etc and so on. If you really want to know let me know and I can discuss it with you in detail in private but I don't want to write a novel here.) To those in the world that think it is an easy way out...think again. You try only eating 4 oz of chicken broth and jello for two weeks when all you want is a Big Mac. Getting to drink milk and eat pudding is like Christmas! It isn't the physical hunger that is difficult. To this day I rarely get "hungry". I can literally go more than 12 hours without feeling hungry most days if I keep busy. I tell people that are about to have it done that the hardest part even to this day is the head hunger. You want to eat all of it so bad that you can't stand it. It tastes soooo good and if you could just eat one more bite. Well, odds are that one more bite will send you running to the bathroom. I equate my new "stomach" capacity to that of a newborn baby. What does a newborn do when it has eaten too much? Burp and throw up. Same here. Not to get too graphic but our stomachs just don't work the way they used to. Food isn't broken down by all that acid. <warning: graphic content ahead> So while when you do throw up it doesn't smell bad, it is essentially just chewed up food. I can say that I can tell exactly what I overate because it tastes the same coming back up as it did going down. Lovely thought huh? I'll stop now that I have made you sick to your stomachs.

But I digress. Where was I? Oh yes. Having gastric bypass is NOT an easy way out. It is a decision that I must live with for the rest of my life. Since having two kids in less than two years, I have probably significanlty stretched out my stomach from where it was since I could eat more while pregnant but to this day I can't eat an entire cheeseburger happy meal at one sitting unless I sit there for at least 30 minutes. Both my two year old and my one year old can out eat me at any meal. Crazy but true.

So the moral to this little story is... if you happen to meet someone who says they have had or will have gastric bypass surgery, please think about how it will effect their lives and remember...

If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all!

Here's a before and after pic (sorry I don't have a recent full body shot)....


Me @ 378 (05/2002) Me 7 mo preggo with DS (02/2005)


Me in Nashville TN (11/2005)

Can you tell a difference?